Yes, indeed, why forgive? Why should we? After all we’ve been hurt, and treated shamefully and unjustly. Don’t we have the right to hold grudges and stay mad? We do – if we want to stay unhappy, we definitely have every right to stay mad and angry. But at the end of the day, what does staying angry and being hurt do to us? Does it make us any happier or better? No. Of course, not! We forgive because it’s what’s best for us in the end. Nothing more, nothing less. We forgive because when this life is over, only those who forgive leave this life with a light heart. They can face God knowing they have not held grudges, or hated someone, but chose to love instead. Those who forgive have a lot more to give to God than those who don’t. When we forgive God looks kindly on us, because He knows how it is to suffer unjustly. Remember, of all people who knows about suffering unjustly, it is God. One of His closest friends betrayed him, another denied Him, and finally His own leaders turned Him in to the Roman government to be crucified. God sees us and He understands us. He knows what it is like to suffer unjustly. We have a better standing with Him when we forgive, because He knows what it’s like to forgive when it is not the easiest thing to do. So, if you want to guarantee favor with God, forgive. Jesus tells us Himself,
Blessed are the merciful: for they shall obtain mercy. {Matthew 5:7}
I know it’s not easy. Believe me, forgiving someone who has treated you unkindly and unjustly is not a walk in the park. It’s very hard. That’s why my advice is, don’t do it alone. Do it with God. It is the only way I have found it possible to forgive again and again in my life. I vent out to God. I tell Him how I feel about the person who has hurt me, and I ask Him to show me why I should forgive that person. I tell the Lord what that person has done to me. Yes, I tell on that person that hurt me. After all, I have very much considered God as my best friend who loves me very much and understands me. Why shouldn’t I tell Him everything when I’m hurting? I can’t hide anything from Him anyway, and if I don’t come and talk to Him about my hurt, who is going to comfort me? Who is going to help me forgive? This way I’m not alone in my sorrow and misery. I have the Lord to share it with. He can show me a side of the person that hurt me I would have not known otherwise, if it was just me trying to do the forgiving. Again and again I have forgiven people because the Lord has shown me reasons why I should. He enlightens my mind. He shows me things I had not even thought of. I am not alone. He is with me to help me forgive.
Friends at times just add pain to my pain. They cause me to justify myself and hold grudges even more. I know they mean well, and because they love me they hurt along with me. But sometimes they don’t want to tell me I might be wrong for fear of offending me. So instead they justify my pain. Really, I get nowhere looking for others to comfort me. I still hurt. I’m still mad and angry. I’m still harboring evil thoughts against another person. But the Lord has an awesome way of opening my eyes to my own foolishness when I’m wrong, and loving me at the same time. He has a way of correcting my way of thinking and justifying me at the same time. When it’s all said and done, He has a way of inspiring me to end up choosing to forgive instead. He heals me. He takes the hurt and pain away. He lifts me up and tells me I am special in His eyes, and that He’s going to bless me if I choose His way and not my way. It’s really a win-win situation for me. That’s why I say, don’t do it alone. Don’t forgive alone because chances are it’s going to be impossible. Do it with God.
Another important successful ingredient with forgiving is to forget. Yes forget. Because how can we possibly successfully forgive someone if we don’t forget what they’ve done to us? I’ve heard it from people’s lips again and again, especially Christians, “I forgive but I’m never going to forget!” This is what I thought too in times’ past. But the Lord has shown me how foolish this thought is. That’s like a person in jail being told he’s free to go, but they have not taken away the ball of chain around his leg. He’s not free at all. If we don’t forget people’s sins against us, we are not free. We are still chained to the memory of the evil the person has done against us. We have not truly forgiven.
How would we like it if the Lord tells us, “Okay, I forgive you, but I’m never going to forget what you’ve done?” Not so cozy anymore, is it? By all means, we want God to forget too. We don’t want Him to just give us a half-way forgiveness. We want His one hundred percent way of forgiving. That means everything we’ve done cast into the sea of forgetfulness. We want Him to definitely forget too! The Bible tells us,
For I will be merciful to their unrighteousness, and their sins and their iniquities will I remember no more. {Hebrews 8:12}
Isn’t that wonderful? Isn’t God so good? He forgets too. That’s how we are able to live again and again in this life and have a friendship with God, because He loves us so much He is willing to forget too.
I know what some of you might be saying, “But if I don’t forget they will continue to abuse me. I can’t have them keep hurting me!” That’s why I strongly advise going to God for this, because He will tell you what to do. You don’t have to live or continue to be friendly with someone who abuses you. By no means, far from it. The Lord Himself has told me to cut off friendships with people that have hurt me. He tells me to forgive them and forget and move on. But He also tells me, “Stop entertaining them. Stop suffering.” He shows me how to cut off my friendships with them. Sometimes He even takes them out of my life. That’s why I am repeating myself on this: don’t forgive alone, make sure you do it with God. He will show you what to do. He will show you how to forgive people, and He will certainly help you to move on as well. He will heal you. He will make sure you live the life of peace that He desires for you to have, as long as you have Him involved every step of the way.
Why forgive? Because why not? When God is on our side and loves us so much, why not forgive? When God can help us live a happier life, why not? It is possible. We can forgive. It is better to forgive than to go on living with a resentful heart. We need to choose forgiveness because it is the happier way to live, and because it will please God so much if we do.
Forbearing one another, and forgiving one another, if any man have a quarrel against any: even as Christ forgave you, so also do ye. {Colossians 3:13}
For if ye forgive men their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you: {Matthew 6:14}
For with what judgment ye judge, ye shall be judged: and with what measure ye mete, it shall be measured to you again. {Matthew 7:2}
The discretion of a man deferreth his anger; and it is his glory to pass over a transgression. {Proverbs 19:11}
Charity suffereth long, and is kind; charity envieth not; charity vaunteth not itself, is not puffed up, {1 Corinthians 13:4}
And above all things have fervent charity among yourselves: for charity shall cover the multitude of sins. {1 Peter 4:8}
Hatred stirreth up strifes: but love covereth all sins. {Proverbs 10:12}
Prayer
Father, I thank You for Your great and boundless love for me. I thank You that You forgive and forget my sins as well! I thank You so much Father for forgiving me from all of my sins! Thank You with all of my heart, Lord Jesus!
Father, this has to be one of the hardest things we do in this life – forgive and forget. We can’t do it alone. I know I can’t do it alone. Time and time again You have helped me to do it. Please Jesus, continue to help me to forgive. Please touch the people’s hearts that have hurt me and let them realize the pain they have caused me in this life. Help them to reflect and repent and to have a change of heart, that they might not continue to hurt others as they have hurt me. I also ask Father, for Your forgiveness upon my sins against anyone I have hurt. I ask that you would please forgive me of any pain I have inflicted on people and have done against anyone. I pray that you will touch their hearts and heal them. Help them to forgive me as well.
We all want to be justified Father, but there is only one person in this life that truly has the right to justify any one of us, and that is You. None of us are deserving of any kindness or goodness. We’ve all sinned and come short of Your glory. No one is perfect. No, not one. Help me to do Your will and what pleases You in this life. Please help me to be mindful of the feelings of others and bring joy instead of pain. I pray this Father in Your most wonderful and precious name, Jesus. Thank You, Father. Amen.
#repost5/2019
